Yes, I am already behind - Eliza was one month old on Monday, and here we are on Thursday and I'm just getting around to posting this. I'm in the midst of a hellish grading extravaganza... I've graded like one million papers in the past week (yes, ONE MILLION), and have barely had time to look at my child. My parents have had all the fun with her, and of course I've been missing things ("OH, I think she just smiled! Oh, she did it again!!" Gee, thanks Mom...), and crying myself to sleep over it (well, not literally... but still...). This sucks! I'm almost finished, just about 30 left to go of the last assignment my students handed in last week.
AND YET, on Monday I still managed to remember that it was her one-month birthday and snapped a few photos (and even caught one of the ever-illusive half smiles she's been doing lately). See? I'm not the horrible mother I've been fearing I am...
My beautiful girl: you are one month old. We have enjoyed every single minute with you since the day you were born. Even when you are crying and fussy, your dad and I always say "she's still the cutest, bestest baby ever born!". And it is true. You are generally a very content little girl. You love being held, you love nursing, you love when your Grandma M sings to you, and you love laying in your changing table staring at your cow picture (it's a little weird, dear child of mine, but whatever floats your boat :) and you love bath time, too. Oh, and you love your mom and dad, of course! ;) You have started smiling once in a while, which is so completely adorable. The smiles you give us are still few and far between, but when we see one... it's like a little glimpse of heaven.
We want to thank you for continuing to be such a great sleeper at night. Your body knows when it's night time, and after you nurse at around 9:30 or 10:00, you are out like a light. You wake up a few times at night, but you always wake up so gently... and I know you are telling me you want to nurse. Then you drift off to sleep again. Your dad and I love sharing a bed with you. We know this precious time won't continue forever, so we are enjoying it while it lasts.
I am sorry I've had so much work to do during your first month of life. I'm sure you are one of only a few babies out there who has attended graduate classes at a mere two weeks of age! I'm sorry I had to drag you all over campus when I'm quite sure you'd have rather been at home sleeping... but I think you secretly loved going to school and being fawned over by all my classmates...! On Tuesday, you came to class with me while I taught, and you slept almost the entire time. My students were tickled to meet you; they all said how beautiful you are and that you look like me. And you have had lots of great bonding time with Daddy, Grandma M and Grandpa P while I've had to sit at the table and grade... so I doubt you have even noticed that Mom has been busy.
You and I have still gotten our quiet time together; this time with you calms my heart and mind like nothing else. The hours I have spent looking down at you while you nurse have been magical, and some of the best hours of my life so far. You are my miracle, Eliza. You are my girl. I love you.